Wednesday, June 24, 2020


I have come to a realization that self-doubt and fear dictate many of the decisions we make almost everyday. It limits what we are willing to try and do. Like a job that maybe you are desiring but don’t feel that you are qualified enough. Or a goal you set for yourself but end up not going after because you are in fear of failing.

I never realized how much self-doubt impacts the decisions I make and the fact that I allow it to limit what I think I am capable of doing. Last year I belonged to a CrossFit box. And truthfully, I really enjoyed it (much to the dismay of my weightlifting and powerlifting friends). And some days I felt like a rockstar, especially the days that were centered more around my strengths. But there were days that I would go on and look at what the programming was and then I would get in my own head about not being able to complete the workout or looking like an idiot because it was a movement I couldn’t do. I allowed these self doubts to poison my thoughts and feelings about the CrossFit experience. And this had nothing to do with the environment or the people. The atmosphere and community in a CrossFit box are as welcoming and friendly as you always here about. My fear of failure crippled me and ultimately caused me to go a different direction.

And the crazy part is, these feelings aren’t about things being too hard or the pain and discomfort that would come from pushing myself. I actually enjoy that discomfort. I have found that for me, especially in group settings, that my biggest fear is failure. I have found my way to work through this in most aspects of my life. But when it comes to my fitness endeavors I still find myself worrying about failing. About setting out to do something and just flat out falling short.

I am working through this and making progress. I am focusing on enjoying the process and not just fixating on the end result. I find that to become overwhelming sometimes and causes me to start doubting myself. And as I continue to fight through those doubts I become surprised by what I am capable of. What any of us are capable of. The mind and body are truly amazing and capable of far more than we give it credit for. We just need to accept that sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail. Sometimes we fail, even if we are not willing to quit. And I find that I need to embrace the progress that is made, even in failure.

Till next time. Stay healthy, find your happy and seek to inspire.

Thursday, June 4, 2020

Actions and Reactions

As I go through this journey that I am on to be better I am learning a lot. I believe I am learning a lot because I am allowing myself to be open to what the universe has to offer.  I want to be better. I want to be a better version of myself everyday. In order to do that I need to be open to any and everything the world has to offer me. 

I have always struggled with reactions. This has been a personal growth focus of mine for a long time. You are probably saying right now, “What the fuck does he mean that he struggles with reactions?” Well what I mean is I struggle with my own reactions. In the past I have let things that happen to me derail whether or not I have a good day, how I do with my nutrition, how I do with my training, and so on and so on. It has taken me a long time to realize that I can only control my reactions and my actions. I can’t control what the world has in store for me today, tomorrow or a year from now.

If I walk out of my house right now and I have four flat tires. I have the power to dictate how I react to this turn of events. For most people, including myself, walking out to your car to find that it has 4 flat tires would be the perfect ingredient for the making of a pretty shitty day. But it doesn’t have to be. I can make the conscience decision in this moment to do what I need to do to rectify the situation and move on from it. Or I can let it linger and allow it to put me in a pissy mood all day long. I can dictate whether or not I throw a shit fit because I have 4 flat tires or I can just accept the situation that is in front of me and focus on making it better. It is in each of our controls to determine whether or not we have a good day each and every day. Regardless of what happens to us. It is up to each and everyone of us to see the beauty and uniqueness of every single day, regardless of what hand we are dealt that day.

The same goes for our actions. I control what I do today. Do I embrace the day, spend time with my kids, work hard, exercise, eat right, show empathy, help others? I make that decision for myself everyday. We all do. We all have a million excuses on why we can’t do these things. We all have many of opportunities to take the easy way out. But I think if we focus on being mentally stronger and controlling our actions, I mean thoughtfully and deliberately making choices, we are the better for it.

Don’t let the world determine if you have a good day today, don’t let your excuses dictate whether or not you do the right thing today. Make thoughtful and deliberate choices that make your day better and do the same for those around you.

Till next time, Stay Healthy, find your Happy and Seek to inspire.